Is your house haunted by Damp? With reports suggesting we should expect some wicked weather tonight, some of us could arrive home after an evening of trick-or-treating fun to find some unwanted dreadful damp stains in our homes.
Allow the Dampbusters here at Peter Cox to go through some of our favourite frighteningly funny Halloween jokes related to damp problems. Read on if you dare…
Petrifying Penetrating Damp
Q. Why are ghosts afraid of rain on Halloween?
A. It dampens their spirits!
The rain might create a suitably scary setting while you are having a ‘fang-tastic’ time with your boys and ghouls this Halloween, but if your property begins showing evidence of damp stains then that really is a nightmare!
Penetrating damp is caused by water finding its way into the home through a defect in the building. So if you notice any tell tale signs of damp this Halloween it is best not to assume that they are a result of a splashing spectre or a drizzly demon and instead make sure you give the building a check to see if you can spot where the water ingress might be coming from, like cracks in the render or damaged drain pipes.
Bone Chilling Condensation
Q. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A. He is mist!
On Halloween of all nights I feel a terribly tortured pun is especially appropriate! If we can get literal for a minute though, fog and mist are just forms of the rather less atmospheric freaky phenomena known as Condensation. Spookily however, it is a little known yet fearsome fact that Condensation is actually the most common form of Damp in homes across the UK. Shocker!
Thankfully we have prepared a howlingly helpful guide of free tips and hints to combat Condensation that you can take a look at on our website.
Q: Why did the Fungi leave the Halloween party?
A: There wasn’t mushroom!
If you didn’t like that one immediately then give it a minute. Like a fungus it could take a while to grow on you (ooft, two petrifying puns for the price of one!). But hang on a minute, I can hear the creatures of the night wailing: “What does this have to do with Damp?” Well, Black Mould is a common side effect of damp and excess condensation in the home, and that monstrous mould is in fact a form of fungi.
Unlike the old joke about Mr Mushroom being a fun guy, there is nothing humorous about black mould and in some extreme cases it can be potentially harmful to human and animal health. So if you believe you have spotted some in your haunted house then we would recommend looking at the information we have online about it.
Contact us to Bust Your Property Ghouls
We hope you enjoyed our run through of some of our favourite Halloween howlers, and remember for all your damp proofing, waterproofing and timber treatment needs get in touch with the
mad scientists specialist surveyors at Peter Cox by contacting us online or giving us a call on 0808 273 2138.